With a careful blend of psychodynamic psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), mindfulness techniques, and person-centered (Rogerian) therapy, the counselors at Rosetta Mental Health are equipped to guide you through the various life transitions that will inevitably find you. You don’t have to go it alone.
When life is moving along smoothly, with no surprises, no change, nothing out of the ordinary, most of us have generally found relative stability, a homeostasis with the state of our life’s affairs. Even if one or more aspects are stressful or challenging, at least it’s a known challenge: we know our boss is a jerk, we know people don’t know how to drive, we know our kids struggle to pick up after themselves. While irritating, these are not surprises; and so at least we have learned to adjust accordingly and carry on. It’s the unexpected, the rogue occurrences of life that have the potential to throw us off, to challenge our treasured status quo of how we navigate life.
As humans, part of our existence necessarily requires that we find a way to deal with change; and the level at which we do so often determines how much we suffer. Getting fired unexpectedly, all of the sudden having to evacuate our homes because of a hurricane or a wildfire, an unexpected road closure on our daily commute: situations like these and how we handle them can show us a lot about ourselves, how equipped we really are to roll with life’s ups and downs. It’s in times of change and stress that we receive valuable opportunities to examine our deeper emotional core. Stress has a way of revealing parts of us that maybe we haven’t taken enough time to learn about, process, and accept.
No. Life has a way of presenting challenges that force us out of our comfort zone. While there is certainly nothing wrong with confronting challenges yourself, sometimes asking for help can accelerate your growth, without your having to reinvent the wheel.
Think about how much of your day-to-day activities run on autopilot, meaning, you really don’t have to think about them much: you get gas at the same station, you shop at the same grocery store, you deal with the same weather patterns, the same potholes, the same behaviors from loved ones, etc. When our brain’s capacity is freed up by automatic and predictable processes, we are then free to explore the things we want to explore, or do the things we have decided are the most important in any given moment. However, if that automation is disrupted, all of the sudden we have to stop everything to regain our footing. Prime example: everyone relies on his/her car to function as it is supposed to, to get them from point A to point B with no unnecessary fanfare…until the car breaks down. Then all the order we had established up to that point is momentarily thrown into disorder, which is unpredictable and, therefore, stressful. And any change is like that, especially if it is unplanned.
The idea of something and the lived experience of something are two very different things. For example, the idea of “moving to Denver” sounds great as an idea, and may actually turn out to be a great decision. However, dealing with the actual fine details of making that happen is an entirely different proposition and experience. Do you know anyone there? Where will you live? How do you set up your utilities? What will your commute be like? Are people friendly there? What is the weather like? Do you know how to drive in snow and ice? All of the sudden, everything you knew and took for granted is thrown into question, forcing you to relearn and adjust basic, everyday functionality, which, of course, can be very stressful.
Face your transition willingly, rather than falling prey to a victim mindset, which only begets more feelings of powerlessness.
Frequently remind yourself of the benefits of the transition.
Use a transition to reflect on your life up to this point and the patterns that seem to have been established, and take the opportunity to improve in any way that you can.
